"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Never underestimate the power of titties
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize