Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
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