It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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