One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
