Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
