what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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