Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
They have beer where we have blood.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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