At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Randomize
