Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
