What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
Randomize