Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I just woke up to three voicemails from you. In the first one you just straight laughed for 3 minutes. In the second you did bird calls. In the third you were hysterically crying. Have fun last night?
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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