Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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