i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
