Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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