I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
Randomize
