what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
