I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize
