Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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