Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize