Texts From Last Night

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  (727): View more from Florida

  Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus

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  (727): Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus http://tfl.nu/l3dr
  Replies (17) Good night (2889) Bad night (711)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day

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  (847): I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day http://tfl.nu/i0qa
  Replies (20) Good night (1717) Bad night (5753)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade

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  (+61): This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade http://tfl.nu/eefh
  Replies (14) Good night (6446) Bad night (672)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night

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  (908): its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night http://tfl.nu/akir
  Replies (73) Good night (1733) Bad night (5563)
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  (949): View more from California

  she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."

  (949): View more from California

  little did she know i was taping her the whole time.

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  (949): she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket." (949): little did she know i was taping her the whole time. http://tfl.nu/jcur
  Replies (53) Good night (9538) Bad night (2485)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.

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  (901): He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him. http://tfl.nu/u51w
  Replies (23) Good night (7263) Bad night (925)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.

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  (507): Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over. http://tfl.nu/ztri
  Replies (7) Good night (2445) Bad night (1594)
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  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.

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  (+64): And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical. http://tfl.nu/yu5v
  Replies (23) Good night (5645) Bad night (1422)
• Favorite

  (214): View more from Texas

  So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.

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  (214): So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest. http://tfl.nu/6468
  Replies (9) Good night (961) Bad night (2240)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"

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  (484): Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret" http://tfl.nu/9brs
  Replies (20) Good night (4948) Bad night (722)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.

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  (412): We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures. http://tfl.nu/02tx
  Replies (6) Good night (1116) Bad night (544)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...

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  (+44): A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh... http://tfl.nu/ky7u
  Replies (5) Good night (599) Bad night (1883)
• Favorite

  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.

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  (413): She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list. http://tfl.nu/zy3q
  Replies (5) Good night (499) Bad night (1086)
• Favorite

  (573): View more from Missouri

  Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it

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  (573): Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it http://tfl.nu/6pfl
  Replies (4) Good night (855) Bad night (279)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.

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  (225): I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys. http://tfl.nu/a4f0
  Replies (3) Good night (323) Bad night (489)

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