God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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