Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
