is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
