Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Hippo gnu deer
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
