Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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