I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Randomize
