Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
