sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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