I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
