I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
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Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
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Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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