she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Randomize
