Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station.
The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize