ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Randomize
