DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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