guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize