so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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