..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
