I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
