Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
Randomize
