Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Randomize
