weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
