I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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