he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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