He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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