yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
