Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
