this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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