If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
