Apparently you make a good broom.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize