Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
where are you?
Hypothermia
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
